Listen, I don’t have a problem with heterosexuals, I work with one, I’m just not sure if I’m comfortable with seeing them on t.v. where impressionable young children can see them.
me: hi how are you today?
customer: JUST LOOKING.
having a crush on someone who’s famous is so awesome because it’s like hey! no chance of rejection. ever. my existence is completely off their radar. they don’t even know i’m alive. this is great. this is a fun time. i am having so much fun